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How Do Figure Out who is Right for you ?

I think a very useful tool in helping you decide what you want in a potential mate is making a list of 10 or more qualities that you’re looking for in your future partner.  These should be non-physical traits that would make you want to be in a relationship with them.  I think so many people get into relationships because they think that’s just the thing to do and then it either blows up in their face or they stay in a relationship because they are “comfortable.” 

I also think you should also make a list of at least 10 qualities about yourself that your potential mate would find desirable.  My list will probably not align with your list, but that’s what makes us individuals. I actually did both and thought I’d share.

10 Qualities in a woman I am looking for

1. smart
2. loving
3. ability to express her feelings
4. ability to see several different points of view without being too judgmental
5. sexually adventurous
6. Doesn’t need to be with me financially.  She’s financially stable on her own
7. Mentally stable (this is all up for debate)
8. interested in exploring the world/life
9. has a love for the arts, music, and a moderate interest in sports
10.   treats others the way she wants to be treated
11.   feminine, fashionable without being shallow and obsessed with it (BONUS)
12.   mentally stable (wait I already said this one…it’s a BIGGIE)

10 Qualities that a woman should know about me and find desirable (with 2 extras thrown in)

1. smart
2. loyal
3. honest
4. successful financially
5. risk taker
6. good friend
7. has big dreams and goals
8. lives an exiting life (travel – life experiences)
9. knowledgable about women’s interests – fashion, art, socially savvy, etc
10. aware of events in the world – wordly
11. Fantastic cuddler
12. open minded in life and in the bedroom

As you can see, the list I wrote up about myself is totally subjective. It  may or may not be the opinion of anyone else, but that’s how I see myself.  At the end of the day, it only really matters what you think about yourself as a person.  After all, only you have to live with yourself.

You might question why you shouldn’t use a laundry list to find that potential perfect mate (that’s perfect for you).  Notice how I didn’t draw up a physical criteria list.  Maybe, we should save that for another day.

If you can take anything from this is;  is that you have to be happy with yourself before you can be happy with anyone else.  You have to love yourself before you can truly love another person. Maybe you’ve learned something and the next guy or girl you meet will be INTO YOU.

richardbrianpenn RBP's Thoughts